Sometimes, falling in love is not a blessing but a disaster. When you fell in love a wrong person, someone who shouldn’t be loved by you, someone who will never love you back, someone who doesn’t even know you will have that feeling, you are trapped.
You can’t go back because you still love that certain someone and you can’t move forward because you know maybe that person won’t be your friend anymore if he/she knows about your feelings about them. What would we do? How could our feelings be snatched away just like that and we couldn’t take it back. It isn’t fair.
I hate it when the pain strikes again, that name appear again and again in your mind. He/she is someone who isn’t yours to dream about but why we couldn’t forget him/her just like that, maybe, because we fell too deep.
Just when you think it couldn’t get any worse, you see him/her falling in love with another person and he/she keeps telling you about their newfound love. Just when you think time could heal it, the pain strikes twice harder than before. Those emotional attachment keeps dragging you back when you decided to leave it all. What could you do?
Before you feel into him/her that deep, I suggest you could manage your expectation of them just in case.
“Expectation is the root of all heartache.” – Elite Daily
According to tinybuddha.com, There are some certain ways to conquer over or minimize your pain caused by over expectation, here they are:
1. Be Aware of Reality
Analyze his/her behavior patterns towards you, is it good or bad? It could be the beginning of you realizing what is truly going on. We can’t deny that sometimes people change their behavior not because of you but their life problems so you don’t really need to be over sensitive too.
2. Stop Manipulating Situations
You know you need validation or approval from that certain someone so you act or behave in a certain way just to make sure they react as you desire but if you keep doing that and they don’t react as you want then you will feel empty; like anything you did before were the most stupid thing you ever did.
“There are two ways to be happy: improve your reality or lower your expectations.” – Elite Daily
3. Let Go
Dispose your expectations out of the window, seriously. Stop thinking of what could be or what should be. Focus on your future, your goal beside anything related to love. What do you want to be but then you have to remain open to all possibilities by staying in the present moment. Who knows someone else will snatch your feeling and they are worthy of it. Keep being positive.
4. Focus on Those Who Love You
There are people who are still beside you even when you are at your worst, who cares for you, who loves you for what you are, and worthy of your love. It might be your parents and friends, best friends, etc. Some people are there for us, they really want to console us, but they don’t know what to do, be there for each other. You’ll feel better in time.
“Give without expectation, accept without reservation, and love with hesitation.” – Elite Daily
5. Learn to Love Yourself
When you are feeling doubtful of yourself, stand in front of the mirror and look at yourself. Tell yourself that you are going to make it through, all of this will end now, and you must build your self-confident. It sounds crazy, but it’s actually working gradually
“You are not what you were, you are a lot stronger than you were.”
It’s absolutely hard and I am still trying to practice all of them. Unrequited love isn’t weak at all, only solid determination can lead you to freedom from unrequited love. Sadly, only few could manage to be freed from this tragic feeling. Be strong!